I used to find it hard
to manage my time, as I was always making myself available to others. Sound familiar? I
frequently worried about friends accepting me if I wasn’t available to help them. I equated being
busy with feelings of being worthy. This type of BAD Busy made me feel like I was
accomplishing things, smiling on the outside while being so exhausted on the inside, but no-one
could tell. I was in a Bad Busy state, always available to others but not available for my personal
needs. My Bad Busy days often meant that I didn’t take the time to assess what I needed in my
personal life, which takes a toll on your mental wellness. Taking time for myself and sitting in
complete silence reminded me of some personal truths that I have a hard time accepting. I had
to learn to accept that I procrastinate out of fear of failing, or that I feel restless when I don’t help
others, or how I wish I could stop worrying about what other people think of me. Yes, I am
human, with flaws and my ability to accept that is gratifying.
I am perfectly imperfect, constantly
growing and learning on this journey to wellness. I have made peace with my flaws and now can
share with others about the importance of not being busy for the sake of being. I began
applying certain strategies that would guide me on my Good Busy path. Not only that, but I
made sure that before committing to something or someone that it was in my best interest to do
so. I fed my spirit with worthiness and feelings of self-love that surpassed the need of
acceptance from others. I started planning and creating lists to help me stay organized and
productive while working on my ability to say NO to people, Nicely of course. Yes, I am a giver
by nature, always looking to help others, but sometimes that can get the best of you. If you’re
always doing things for others, your wellness stores are running low, with nothing or anyone to
restore them. My bad busy days of saying Yes, Yes, Yes...out of fear of feeling guilty quickly
faded and my Good Busy days are on the rise.
